Revisiting your core bearings when life’s pendulum swings.
Eric Miller is a New Yorker. A Long Islander more specifically. There is a big difference between the Long Islanders, the Manhattanites and the Upstaters. New York is such a diverse state, these subgroups might as well be different countries.
Growing up in Long Island in middle class family, Eric knew what hard work looked like. His father owned a small business that went through the normal cycles of boom and bust. He worked right there with his dad and learned how to adjust and pivot when times got tough. He didn’t know it then, but he was building up skills that would pay him back later in life.
Eric explained, “I saw first-hand how hard my dad worked. He put his entire life into his business and when it went under, I thought it was the end of the world. He didn’t though, Dad pivoted, changed direction and quickly moved to start another business with greater potential.” The pendulum swung but his father adjusted to the change.
Important Lessons are Learned During Failures
As in many cases with life, the important lessons are often in the failures and the challenges. We tend to rise to meet the moment using skills and traits that may either be currently hidden or simply undeveloped up until that time.
When it came time for Eric to pursue a life path, he knew he wanted to attend college. As a first-generation college student, he had to blaze his own trail and chose a major that reflected his core interests: Psychology and Communication. Despite his self-admission as a “data geek”, he felt these two areas would be the most powerful areas for his career focus.
It turned out Eric chose well. His natural analytic skills in combination with his love of people helped propel his career into key positions at major corporations and into a key role in talent management for the entertainment industry, at one point managing over 1200 people through his system.
But again, the pendulum of life was ready to swing the other way.
Diagnosis and Defeat — Personally and Professionally
“I was at the top of my game,” he shared. “I had a wonderful family life, and I was working with international corporations solving all the world’s problems when suddenly, I had to focus on my own problems. Being successful does have a way of deluding ones thinking and robbing your humility. It’s easy to feel omnipotent.”
Eric didn’t know his life was about to change until he returned from an annual physical. The doctor’s office called to tell him that his blood count was elevated, and they wanted to see him again…soon. Within a period of just a few weeks he went from normalcy to meetings, biopsies and more testing.
Finally, the doctor gave him the words nobody wants to hear, “You have cancer.”
Positivity and Encouragement Go A Long Way
Over the next year Eric’s life would begin to change. But not just his medical treatments. His entire outlook on life took on a completely different meaning. “I finally began to realize the importance of my time here and the value of every day. I began to rekindle my faith and make it part of my daily focus. I realized that each day was a gift and that it could me my last. I began labeling each day as a ‘plus one’ day.”
And then, almost a year from his diagnosis, the immediate risk of his cancer had lessened. But at the same time, his employment status changed. The pendulum was swinging again.
“Worry Subtracts Minutes from Living”
“Life teaches us that it is constantly changing, and I must change with it, Eric said. “The illness forced me to reevaluate what is important. I’ll always have the fear of the cancer returning in full force. Right now, we are in constant monitoring and “active surveillance”. In the meantime, I don’t focus on it, I am going to live my life in a way that generates the greatest joy. I remind myself that when I worry, I’m subtracting minutes from living.”
Just like his father did after the business downturn, Eric pivoted professionally. He identified the key things that were most important to him. Everything pointed to one common element – People. Eric knew that his future should be centered about helping people.
“My family is at the top of my priorities but beyond that, everything I’m doing today is driven by the spirit of trying to help people. My background has given me so many gifts that I can now share in ways to improve and enhance the lives of others,” Eric exclaimed.
Today, Eric’s focuses on helping people accomplish their next goal. Whether he is working with people that recently lost their jobs, helping students with career exploration decisions and direction, or consulting with HR professionals to improve their company’s policies and programs, Eric is fulfilling his mission… to help people. His company, north star advisors inc. provides mentoring, coaching and consulting services, while other engagements allow him to contribute to talent acquisition and advising.
“I never thought I would be thankful for the onset of my cancer,” Eric said. “But the benefit is that God has allowed me to design a life that is in line with my true values and talents. I’m grateful, my family is grateful, and I believe my clients are grateful for the ‘new’ Eric.”
Even if the pendulum is swinging in the wrong direction, remember that every day is a “plus one” day. Make it your best!